Discussion of movies and ReelThoughts topics

It is currently Sat Dec 27, 2014 2:55 am




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 36 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next
READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum 
Author Message
Critic
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jul 29, 2009 9:35 am
Posts: 6500
Location: Easton, MD
Post READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
If you would have told me back in 2009 that it would fall to me one day to write this, I might have laughed. I used to (and to a certain degree, still do) rub people the wrong way by being aggressive in my disagreements over movies here. I would sometimes respond to divergent opinions with "You're joking, right?" and I got into a legendary battle with Ragnarok which ended up becoming its own thread. You can probably still find it.

And I'm not certainly not perfect now (I made a snipe towards MGamesCook in the Wolf of Wall Street thread that I had to edit quickly because I realize how dickish it was) but I really like you guys, and I really like talking film with you all. However, in the last month or so, I think there's been a marked downturn in civility on the forum. Pedro had to ban someone for a week, we had a fight today that got ugly, and some of the disagreements lately have devolved quickly into personal attacks.

Now there is no question that some people here and more guilty than others, but I would like to remind everyone that this forum, though small, is a cut above the rest of the internet in terms of the intelligence and film knowledge displayed by its denizens. We should strive to keep it that way. So please:

    -No ad hominem attacks. By all means criticize other people's opinions, but in a constructive way, focusing always on the argument, not the person. There is never any cause for statements like "Must you extent your dim-witted pretentiousness even to video games?"
    -Try to limit the "I disagree with EVERYTHING you just said", black vs. white approach to discussion. Often two or three people will be having a good discussion about, say, Christopher Nolan and then a third party will come by and say something like "Nolan is totally overrated and everything he does sucks." It is conversation-kryptonite folks. Don't do it.
    -Remember that always sticking with the consensus opinion is boring, but so is being an iconoclast for the sake of it. Focus on what you feel about a movie and what the other person feels about the movie, not your perception or idea of why they feel the way they do.
    -Lastly, and this one is for me certainly as well as for all of you, remember that we're all smart, knowledgable men here. We don't need to prove it in every interaction. Being nice is as important is being smart, particularly online.


Thanks for reading, and let's make this a warmer, friendlier 2014.

_________________
I'm lithe and fierce as a tiger


Sat Jan 04, 2014 8:38 pm
Profile
Producer
User avatar

Joined: Sun Oct 07, 2012 6:26 pm
Posts: 2157
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
JamesKunz wrote:
remember that we're all smart, knowledgable men here.

:cry:

_________________
The temptation is to like what you should like--not what you do like... another temptation is to come up with an interesting reason for liking it that may not actually be the reason you like it.


Sat Jan 04, 2014 9:47 pm
Profile
Director
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jun 30, 2009 1:35 am
Posts: 1786
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
Ken wrote:
JamesKunz wrote:
remember that we're all smart, knowledgable men here.

:cry:


Unless there are women posting.

_________________
Evil does not wear a bonnet!--Mr. Tinkles


Sat Jan 04, 2014 10:17 pm
Profile
Critic
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jul 29, 2009 9:35 am
Posts: 6500
Location: Easton, MD
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
Alas, there aren't. There have only been 2 in my time here, and they're both long gone

_________________
I'm lithe and fierce as a tiger


Sat Jan 04, 2014 10:27 pm
Profile
Producer

Joined: Thu Oct 11, 2012 7:44 pm
Posts: 2026
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
Quote:
not your perception or idea of why they feel the way they do
.

Is there no place for this discussion? It's a topic that pretty much every blogger and critic delves into at one point or another. I understand that I need to be more civil, but I think there should be a place for this discussion because it's a serious issue.

A woman on this forum really wouldn't hurt either.


Sat Jan 04, 2014 10:30 pm
Profile
Producer
User avatar

Joined: Sun Oct 07, 2012 6:26 pm
Posts: 2157
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
When I bought the first issue of the new Sandman, the girl at the counter at the comic book store was A. really cute, and B. a girl. Many expectations were subverted that day.

She has surely walked through fire and that scares me.

_________________
The temptation is to like what you should like--not what you do like... another temptation is to come up with an interesting reason for liking it that may not actually be the reason you like it.


Sat Jan 04, 2014 10:37 pm
Profile
Director
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jun 30, 2009 1:35 am
Posts: 1786
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
JamesKunz wrote:
Alas, there aren't. There have only been 2 in my time here, and they're both long gone


Which may explain why The Wolf of Wall Street's doing so well here. The few women I've corresponded with about it have a bit of a problem with it.

_________________
Evil does not wear a bonnet!--Mr. Tinkles


Sat Jan 04, 2014 10:49 pm
Profile
Critic
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jul 29, 2009 9:35 am
Posts: 6500
Location: Easton, MD
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
MGamesCook wrote:
Quote:
not your perception or idea of why they feel the way they do
.

Is there no place for this discussion? It's a topic that pretty much every blogger and critic delves into at one point or another. I understand that I need to be more civil, but I think there should be a place for this discussion because it's a serious issue.



I respect that this conversation can have value, but 9 times out of 10 it becomes "You're only praising it because it's Scorsese" and people get offended because it seems (and, frankly, is) presumptuous

_________________
I'm lithe and fierce as a tiger


Sat Jan 04, 2014 10:51 pm
Profile
Producer
User avatar

Joined: Sun Oct 07, 2012 6:26 pm
Posts: 2157
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
Not only is it presumptuous, but it's a strategy designed to kill the conversation rather than further it. It puts the other person in a position where everything they say is preemptively discredited no matter what the content is.

_________________
The temptation is to like what you should like--not what you do like... another temptation is to come up with an interesting reason for liking it that may not actually be the reason you like it.


Sat Jan 04, 2014 10:55 pm
Profile
Critic
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jul 29, 2009 9:35 am
Posts: 6500
Location: Easton, MD
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
Ken wrote:
Not only is it presumptuous, but it's a strategy designed to kill the conversation rather than further it. It puts the other person in a position where everything they say is preemptively discredited no matter what the content is.


Point.

_________________
I'm lithe and fierce as a tiger


Sat Jan 04, 2014 10:58 pm
Profile
Second Unit Director
User avatar

Joined: Fri Oct 12, 2012 2:49 am
Posts: 445
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
MGamesCook wrote:
Is there no place for this discussion? It's a topic that pretty much every blogger and critic delves into at one point or another. I understand that I need to be more civil, but I think there should be a place for this discussion because it's a serious issue.


There's room for it in a general sense, but it has to be used well. Slamming someone for "following the consensus" or for liking something for similar reasons that critics like something is not at all the same thing when those accusations are just lobbed in.


Sat Jan 04, 2014 11:22 pm
Profile
Cinematographer
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 10, 2012 4:40 pm
Posts: 559
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
JamesKunz wrote:
Pedro had to ban someone for a week, we had a fight today that got ugly, and some of the disagreements lately have devolved quickly into personal attacks.

Awww, there was a fight today and I missed it? This what happens when you try to make kettle corn. :(

EDIT: Nevermind, I found it. <*munch, munch*>

_________________
"Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in the rain."


Sat Jan 04, 2014 11:40 pm
Profile
Cinematographer
User avatar

Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2012 5:51 pm
Posts: 518
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
I'm disappointed.

_________________
I no longer have an image here! I got away with it for so long...


Sun Jan 05, 2014 12:30 am
Profile
Director
User avatar

Joined: Sun Nov 18, 2012 2:37 am
Posts: 1199
Location: Laurel, MD
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
Thanks guys. This means a lot to me. What happened today tremendously upset me, but I'm over it now. Indeed this forum is a definite cut above others (gamefaqs for example) I've frequented in terms of civility and intelligence. I surf it a lot during downtime at work and find it tremendously entertaining. Always have, always will.

_________________
https://www.facebook.com/ken.rossman.5


Sun Jan 05, 2014 12:50 am
Profile
Second Unit Director
User avatar

Joined: Sat Jul 16, 2011 4:22 am
Posts: 419
Location: Chennai, India
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
There was a discussion of contrarian opinions somewhere in which I mentioned the only thing a person can really do is be truthful about their opinions. If you see a film and like it and say so, then no matter what the reason for liking it is - and it could be something as trivial as it's Scorsese - no one can take that away from you.

Anyways, I am glad the mods took a stand on this.

_________________
Balajithots - Last Updated 21-Jan - Frozen (2013)
This list... is an absolute good. The list is life. All around its margins lies the gulf.


Sun Jan 05, 2014 1:04 am
Profile WWW
Auteur
User avatar

Joined: Sun Oct 07, 2012 12:02 pm
Posts: 4025
Location: Zion, IL
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
KWRoss wrote:
Thanks guys. This means a lot to me. What happened today tremendously upset me, but I'm over it now. Indeed this forum is a definite cut above others (gamefaqs for example) I've frequented in terms of civility and intelligence. I surf it a lot during downtime at work and find it tremendously entertaining. Always have, always will.

Glad you're feeling better.

Gamefaqs is nothing compared to IMDB, I swear that place is like a network of trolls.


Sun Jan 05, 2014 2:25 am
Profile
Producer

Joined: Thu Oct 11, 2012 7:44 pm
Posts: 2026
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
I extend my apologies to KWRoss and all forum members who were offended. I didn't intend for anyone to take it THAT personally. I can assure everyone that I honestly had no feelings of hatred or maliciousness by posting those things. I didn't mean a heck of a lot by it. I honestly had no expectation that it would provoke such an ordeal, that wasn't my intention at all. Truth is, I don't know why I posted it and I wish I could take it back. And this is something I want to say, whether people believe it or not: I do not enjoy angering or upsetting people. My intentions are not, and have never been sadistic or anything like that. I'm not asking for instant forgiveness, but hopefully one or two people on here understand that I want to move on and try to take the message of this thread to heart. If anyone were to find it in themselves to pretend it didn't happen, I would be a lot happier. Perhaps others would be happier too? I dunno, I'd like to think so.


Sun Jan 05, 2014 4:44 am
Profile
Auteur
User avatar

Joined: Sun Oct 07, 2012 12:02 pm
Posts: 4025
Location: Zion, IL
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
That's cool man, I understand where you're coming from, I myself have sometimes posted without thinking clearly and later regretted it.


Sun Jan 05, 2014 5:31 am
Profile
Assistant Second Unit Director
User avatar

Joined: Sun Oct 07, 2012 1:52 pm
Posts: 100
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
Well damn, it would appear that I've missed out on quite a lot! :lol: :lol: :lol:


Sun Jan 05, 2014 3:26 pm
Profile WWW
Producer
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2011 9:04 am
Posts: 2725
Location: Lancashire, England.
Post Re: READ PLEASE - General Civility on the Forum
MGamesCook wrote:
Quote:
not your perception or idea of why they feel the way they do
.

Is there no place for this discussion? It's a topic that pretty much every blogger and critic delves into at one point or another. I understand that I need to be more civil, but I think there should be a place for this discussion because it's a serious issue.

A woman on this forum really wouldn't hurt either.



Joking me. I come here to escape 'em.

_________________
... because I'm a wild animal


Sun Jan 05, 2014 4:19 pm
Profile
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 36 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Google Adsense [Bot], Google [Bot] and 4 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group.
Designed by Vjacheslav Trushkin for Free Forum/DivisionCore.
Translated by Xaphos © 2007, 2008, 2009 phpBB.fr